Joke

Try this -> "What's Your Pirate Name"

You answer several questions and the site generates a pirate name for you--- mine was "Calico Tom Rackham"--- and also provides a brief profile of your character. Mine was:

Often indecisive, you can't even choose a favorite color. You're apt to follow wherever the wind blows you, just like Calico Jack Rackham, your namesake. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!